Five Bizzare Bouts Fight Circus Should Host
The promotion that brought car jiu jitsu to the masses and took fighting in a phone booth a little too literal, Fight Circus, has brought to us some incredible fights.
Siamese kickboxing, headbutts only, the Wheel of Violence, Indian leg wrestling Fight Circus is probably the best fight promotion in existence. But I want more. More bizzareness. More violence. More.
I am being greedy. So today, I want to talk about five events Fight Circus could bring to the big show. Some novel, some need the promotional prowess of Jon Nutt behind it.
Game of Death: An Homage to Bruce Lee
Game of Death is a movie starring Bruce Lee that was released controversially and posthumously. It revolutionized how movies were thought of and brought to us the tower of bad guys that we see in many martial arts movies today.
Well, I want Fight Circus to do that in real life. Preferably in a five-story building. I want to see how far an MMA guy can make it to the top. First level: a karateka to take their head off. Level two: sumo guy. Level three: a freestyle wrestler. Level four: Muay Thai fighter. Level five: Kareem Abdul-Jabar. (If they can’t afford Kareem, then any other MMA fighter would work, I guess.)
This would be pretty insane if we’re being honest. Can you go through five people in one night? Probably not. But it’s worth the viewing.
X-Arm, The Fight Circus Response to Power Slap
Power Slap kinda sucks. It’s the Fight Circus’ responsibility to offer a viable* alternative. To combat that, we need to go ahead and dust off the ole X-Arm table and bring back combat arm wrestling. Seriously, get a load of this:
This sport is absurd. But at least you can defend yourself and avoid being hit unlike another sport we all rail against.
*viable = more violent
Wheel of Violence on a round by round basis
The Wheel of Violence is pretty rad. Before the fight two fighters do not know what rule set they are about to compete under. The wheel is spun, and the fight is determined. In the past, Fight Circus has done events where the rule set changes each round. What I’m suggesting is for us to allow chance to decide. First round is headbutts only. Second round is only spinning attacks.
This will ensure maximum violence and make the fight unpredictable. If we keep the same Wheel of Violence and assume a five-round fight, that would be 7,776 different variations of a fight that could be had.
The Duel of K’un-Lun
Straight out of Marvel’s Iron Fist series, The Duel of K’un-Lun decides who possesses the power and mantle of the Immortal Iron Fist. In the fight, two combatants are tied together by one hand and are fated to duke it out.
If Fight Circus can get a hold on K’un-Lun, they can offer up the city and title as the winner. Or a super cool belt with a fiery fist on it and the inaugural title of The Immortal Iron Fist, a defendable title. Then we can follow the lineage through the centuries.
Parkour MMA
This one could be controversial. Combine parkour and mixed martial arts. Corners, jumps, and other obstacles to fight around. Joe Rogan says have fighters fight in a football field all the time because he feels the cage isn’t realistic for real life situations. I’ve never been in a fight in the middle of a football field. But indoors, that’s been done many times.
Let’s be safe and ban drop kicks and other stuff that could seriously hurt people and pad the entire arena. Also give yellow and red cards for those that flee too much and aren’t doing rad parkour moves.
When you see these on the upcoming Fight Circus card, thank me. I’ve got plenty more where this comes from.
